Clients From Hell


I need a discount because of our connection.

Simply because you’re my senior from school [ ten years senior and I never knew you in school ] or a senior from the same educational institute – not even the same college under that institute – or wait [!] you’re from the same city I lived in for a decade – father being posted across every three years means I have connections in dozens of cities – what about the towns and states then? Or even countries? Oh wait, maybe I should just do everything for free for the larger good of humanity! Ah ha!

Yeah, fuck that. I have a connection / link with all human beings – it’s called genetics.


As far as a majority of clients are concerned, if they could have their way, they’d NEVER pay for design. Routinely they’re getting their wives and college kid and school kid and kid-living-down-the-street to do their designs for them and then whingeing about the bad quality when they seek feedback from their janitor. Idiots.

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I want something simple

Is not equal to free!
What the fuck is wrong with people – do you get onions for free? Then how can you even think that design services will be for free? I mean… HOW!?

Sure you’re a Life Coach – like you’re saving humanity – and you have a website your Sister-in-Law’s son designed for you [ aaaaaaargh! ] and you take inhuman pride in claiming that he did it for free for you and now you want me to design you a logo for free?

I am a one-person shop and ‘budget’ is a word I haven’t heard of.

Well, good-mornin to ya chump, I’m a one-person shop too and like you, [ I hope ], I have bills to be paid – and forget bills – I aint doin no charity. So quit kidding and get to the point. I sometimes wonder how nice it would be to organize a competition among potential clients. The question asked will be “Tell me why I should do your design for free? The most convincing answer will get a 50% discount on my regular professional fee! Yippee!”

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Clients From Hell : Yeah

Bitching about clients. The bad ones. And boy are there many. The good ones are meant for the real, company-linked design blog. The bad ones go down in history here - I wish I could tell them to their face where they're screwing up but then I'll just be a poor designer instead of the decently rich one I am now. Compromises.